opening my eyes to life.

when i was eighteen i was in what could and probably should have been a horrific car accident. i was the passenger in the front seat of my friend heathers car. we were driving in snow and ice, we probably should have been home. but eighteen year olds know everything, so we were driving in the ice and snow.

as we started to slide and heather could tell she was no longer in control of the car, i remember her saying, "i love you jessica.  hold on tight..." and in that second i wondered if those were the last words i would ever hear. i braced myself the best i could with my body and shut my eyes tight. i was scared. and down we spiraled out of control flipping four times down a large steep ravine until landing upside down in a shallow creek.

after the car stopped moving, i opened my eyes to find the top of my head resting of the roof of the car and more over could not believe that i was alive. i looked out my window unbroken; but flush with the window was a large tree trunk that had fallen and given a few inches could have possibly broken my window and fatally injured my head.

i remember looking at heather. and smiling.

we pushed open our car doors and slowly began walking up the steep hill to many onlookers and cars pulled over on the side of the road as the police pulled up.

the police jumped out of his car as we were almost up the ravine to the main road; looked at us and looked down at our car - shaking his head and said, "if people do not believe in miracles i am gonna tell them to come look at this."

it was one of the scariest things i have ever went through. one moment life is good and you are fine; then suddenly life flashes before your eyes.


i never will forget the feeling of opening my eyes to life.

today as i was driving home from work there was more traffic and i was over it. i just wanted to get home and enjoy some time at home and the last thing i wanted to do was sit in traffic.


then i thought of my wreck so many years ago. and the people that witnessed our car lose control and stopped to help two strangers in need, irregardless of what they would find.

today i was impatient, i wanted to get home and do my thing.  

my thing.

given no thought of the fact that up ahead someone was probably hurt, wounded or scared. someone's mother, sister, brother, friend.

and there i was in my air conditioned car, with my preference of music on, fully charged cell phone.


i needed to check myself. and then i was thankful.

thankful that when i was eighteen i survived what could have been the end of my life as i know it. that i have been able to love and give love. that i have gotten to influence children's lives. that i have been able to grow into an adult and find my way.

clearly, i am still growing and evolving.  and am not where i need to be.

not even close. i need to remember to count my blessings daily, hourly - by the minute. because they are a plenty.

under construction:  that's me, jessica.

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